Dear Emperor,
I have information that will shake up the system. While hiding inside a bathroom stall of a Fortune 500 company, I recorded a secret conversation between two high-powered executives. I have provided you with a partial transcript and if it arouses your interest as I’m sure it will I expect to be paid as I need hard cash to leave the country with my life.
Here’s how it went down:
Executive 1: He must not become a comedian.
Executive 2: He is but a boy. If he can be turned to the dark side of comedy…
Executive 1: Can this be done? Can he be turned into my sniveling little bitch?
Executive 2: He will join NBC or die, my master!
Wait! I sense a disturbance at the door! I hear voices telling me it’s time for me to take my medication. This how they discredit Tea Party members in America
Sincerely living in fear, Lee Harvey X-File
Somewhere Between
